Let the adventures begin

I’ve been unemployed in Toronto for 6 weeks now, and I’ve figured out how to fill my time.

A few weeks ago, it felt like I’d be wallowing in profound homesickness for the rest of my life. Back home I’d found my favorite yoga studio of all time, a vibrant music community, and had started building closer relationships with family members. Things seemed better than ever when I left, so naturally I’ve felt some grief. But sadness will only grow if you feed it, so I chose to distract myself by finding some good things here. And as it turns out, that's incredibly easy. Last week, upon returning from a week visiting friends and family, I delved into some new activities.

Thursday: Ecstatic dance night with friends

Friday: Sleeping off a cold, cooking, chores. Checked out a music festival downtown with Sean (transit time: 1 hour). Watched university fashion students doing a random catwalk practice after crowd dispersed.

Saturday: St. Lawrence Farmer’s Market, solo, since Sean works this weekend. Rescued an inchworm stuck to a raspberry by placing it (raspberry and all) in a flower planter. Evening: Sean drove us to friend’s house in the “country” (Markham) where we enjoyed live music, bonfire and conversation.

Sunday: Checked out UU church, met choir director and a few other folks.

Monday: potluck at a friend’s house, where we ran into a half dozen people we knew (yay!).

As you can see, there’s plenty to do in Toronto. So while I accept (despite anyone’s well-meaning opinion), that I’ve lost something by leaving the place where I first laid down roots, it would be an understatement to say that Toronto compensates for my loss. There are 10-12 festivals every single summer weekend, 3 ecstatic dance nights a week (to my knowledge), farmer’s markets everywhere (to the tune of having one at the local shopping mall), and that’s only the tip of the iceberg. Living in a city like Toronto is the kind of thing that could change you. I already feel myself becoming more optimistic, more interested in things, maybe a little more bold. Could it be because I live in one of the safest, most beautifully diverse cities in the world? Could it be the opportunities and capital out there calling my entrepreneurial spirit forth?  Could it be that I’m in love and feel grounded and supported?

Let the adventures begin.

Looking through Photos

Looking through photos today - I’ve already had an amazing life. Not only have I gotten to live in Northern Coastal California, one of the most beautiful places in the world, but I’ve also discovered the heart of Ohioan life: barbecues, waterfalls, and faithful company. My computerized photos encompass the best moments of the past 7 years (since I owned a digital camera): family at their best, turning points of new relationships budding, and celebrations of sturdy friendships. When I thought of it, I also documented the familiar seasonal sights like glorious fall leaves, spring cherry blossoms, and icicles dangling from the roof.

Over the past 7 years I’ve been quite transitory. I returned from a bit of soul-drifting in northern Idaho to start grad school in Kent, Ohio, where I rented a rambling split-level with 2 other students. In spring 2010 followed my first job to a brick cabin in Wooster, Ohio, where I experienced rural Ohio- the good, the gutsy, and the ugly. In fall of 2012, missing my family and feeling more and more connected to friends in Akron, I moved in with a friend near Akron’s Cuyahoga Valley. Just a month after that move, Sean proposed to me and I realized I’d be moving again- this time, all the way to Toronto, where I’ve now at last come to roost.

Each situation lent itself to different friends and routines, different windows onto nature. For example, in Wooster I had a long open backyard that allowed a fantastic view of a rainbow one day, as well as shots of the many flowers and wild strawberries on the property. In Akron, our backyard was quite small so I’d walk down to Sand Run Parkway and take pictures of the stream. Or if my roommate’s kids were around, we’d hang out in the backyard picking flowers and chasing each other. In Toronto, we have no backyard, but the balcony is full of culinary herbs and tomatoes in pots. Nature is something to be coveted and cultivated in the city, which makes a trip to the country extra luscious.

All that moving has worn me out, and I’m at a point where I’d be willing to stay in this 1-bedroom high rise with Sean for years just to avoid doing it again. But looking through photos, I appreciate a hidden benefit of moving: my sheer variety of life experience. For example, I regretted giving up my cozy, personalized cabin to move to into a cramped house in Akron. However, if I hadn’t moved in with Carrie, I would have never built the close friendship that I now enjoy with her. I also wouldn’t have learned life lessons like how to share a tight space, let go of little things, and live with frustrations while still remaining friends. Also, I would never have had such an intimate relationship with the Cuyahoga Valley, which I now see for the beautiful gem that it is.

I think, on a deeper level, these frequent changes have yielded another lesson: carpe diem. It is true: time passes, things fade away, and it’s totally up to me to decide how deeply I fall in love with each experience. Painful regrets have been worthwhile if only for teaching me to go deeper into every friendship, every situation I am blessed to visit in my life. Take those risks and find those hidden jewels in each community, from the jaded rustbelt of Akron, OH to the shiny new metropolis of Toronto, ON.